Cologne companions (An Excerpt from my Diary)

Dear Moavi,

(Part1- Patience)

I guess it’s been too long since the last time we converse and its string of long shared bonding that we share with us. I wonder all those years how would I have survived if it wasn’t you all those talks all those jokes which just you could laugh at, haven’t just erased from my mind they’re there in the folder of unforgetful memories and I just linger to dwell over them turning the pages of an epitome melody. I stand today in front of you piercing my sharp pen over your tinder pages just jotting and bolting down those wild thoughts keeping peace and harmony with the lost and the forgotten. Like the replica of someone I lost, someone I used to admire in glittery shiny mirrors. Still like the old days still savored those flatteries of words we exchanged, even today you didn’t protest the assault even today I ripped you apart more gruesome than I thought. Still why you didn’t utter to resist the freeway rape, why you have been so kind to me dear. Why ??, that’s the answer I seek. Knowing I’ll haunt you only the times when I was vulnerable, melancholy has always been there yet you never got fed up from all fetish amalgamated dim and diminished thoughts, where all I have to offer you were the exact same repeated verses gloom masqueraded in trains presented under the gambling dungeons. You turned me cruel in the salvation of rebellious freedom, leaving me miserable under the realm of mercy. Blindingly seeking for the denial you never gave, the denial you were so partial with as the biased you only favored the privileged. Your silence haunts me it haunts to the core of my existence to the soul long dead and devastated. Unharmed I stand unharmed from the battlefield where everyone died not a warrior indeed for me you chose the death of a coward. In the vicinity of isolation, you jailed me in the solitary walls of introspection pushing the looper again to travel in the past of randomness till the ink refills itself again till the pages turn back being naïve, no more agitated instead a bud on the brink of lawlessness. As there I cry, as there I refuse to wipe my tears. The needle and the elation in that stroke of dear Midnight blue, the adobe of lost and broken. You were there just lying like a bride ready with possession, while I was your no terms and conditions. With the curves of exploding cursive heart, I choired your name with passionDear Moavi, Vague and nebulous is the beginning of all, not necessarily the ending.

(Part2- Hope)

Life is a journey of unexpected expectations and it still goes on, never-ending with the snake biting his own tail. It was a different day and yet it was different indeed the destiny was always there and I’m thankful to her as she always knew when to plunge the dagger into the back, knew all the ways to betray when you need her the most. Still, I don’t oppose her I accept it as a man does need enemy more than friends and every story is epic, only when the dagger has been plunged into the back. Dear, today I met someone vibrant avid enthusiastic and unique, although I may be breaking rules here still the names are one of the best creations we ever had we carry it all the way through our career the whole course of life a jeweled garnet, sovereignty of yours ruled by the tenants. Today I met Stephen Robert. Well,…he’s brilliant for starters speaks fluent English had far preciously furnished writing that I’ll never have and it was a century-long conversation we ought. Really there’s a model of knowledge we can learn from everyone as in my pursuit of traveling I tried to taste that drop of salvation, being truthful when you see so many problems the warmth and tender un-symmetricity with which people appreciate there gullible attempts to hide all their worries reflected by just this trifle question of “how’s you”, that healing echo of “I’m fine” is the beginning of there healing. Not just that in the pursuit I find the immunity to run away from my alibies. Being indulged in everyone else, with the lack of empathy on my side. Yes, I can feel and hear you shouting that’s not the solution, yes dear I know it’s not but I’m weak as you can see. I was really thrilled when we planned to visit this school called Manna Wisdom far away from the sensitive and introvertly beautiful town of Bhubaneswar, we went ahead and ahead crossing the paths, feeling the old arid yet blushing wind. Accurately like a game of teasing playfully, the same scenic vegetation which always seemed to be beamed and delighted waved it’s regard, as the evening teenage sun guided us through the doorway only to realize the long-awaited journey finally brought us to the pavement. I was scared to move I was feared to be tangible. I feared to face that strength, that strength called hope. I entered with trembling hands not a new thing except an old question where I just can’t lie one I just can’t fake, I hope to acquire myself rather than being everyone else. It was a challenging sight to see as I enter and I won’t refrain from using the word challenge, there were so many young boys and girls and their mentors. Today I won’t be arguing or nagging about how things could have been better, what more ways could have been permuted to just jump on the debates, but instead, I’ll bend to the power of satisfaction and recognition. It grinds you through a holy war amongst you and your mind. Where all you see are problems, dwelling there from ages. I saw comfort in their eyes and the same physical elastic fear was returning through my eyes. A lovely common point to begin the mischief. The exact moment I entered their cubical small box of classes, my sight just lingered on a board a bold fanatic which said with audacity “If you think you can, you can”.

(Part3- Faith)

Being poor, when it comes to remembering names I started talking with them dividing into groups, talking about world richest man. Was that giving false hope? or just a serious joke of haphazard? Still the way I think I was the worlds richest at that very moment. We taught them about computers never felt such zeal in pressing those numeric keys till that day, never felt such joy in changing the font of Bill Gates, as we all were there founders of our own algorithms just laughing while inserting pictures, changing colors of everything that was presented. You never knew, but there are millions of ways billions of glasses but none is so unique as your perspective to look & your vision to charm every toiling Hindrance. Yes, there we were father of our own Google and Microsoft. A window of opportunity a startup where everything closed its doorway. The perfect truth and lies you can’t ignore. Dear, time just flew away, flew like a glorious dream of which everything you wanted to keep captivated within yourself. But unlike the dream here you had the memories, memories of everything that remained. So as we reach the third part boring you all through the end, knowing in the whole cosmos there’s only you to do that. I asked Stephen what was the last time you saw your parent which he didn’t remember, “so do they visit you” I asked with bounded independence, “No” he said again. But I wasn’t disappointed for long as there was someone, someone more benevolent and superior smilingly as he said Jesus does both of them.I’m an atheist obviously with a strong belief in God, with a strong sense that there is someone there is something. The positive energy of unlikely yet justified contemplated canopy of happiness and I bow to that, I bow till my heart extends. I’m a believer in the voyage of lost romantic resonance. I think I should end now as the words forget the measure of the count, as the words and the feeling of the heart doesn’t always combine to unite and as I’m not an intriguing incisive writer, we had a great picture together I waived my hands and he did the same, I said study well and he assured he’ll.  I don’t weep dear and that’s my biggest weakness I can hardly claim or show my attachments, yet it was a sweet kiss of bliss to spend time with them to learn to believe and the importance of not escaping but facing your problems by yourself. It’s a delicate feeling dear to realize you have problems and you have someone to put faith in them to blend love and affection in them to support you, to make you rise from ashes. Wherever you go whatever the problems you face there always be you. Eternally to look after yourself.

(As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others- Bill Gates)

By- Kshitij Sinha
31/7/2017 

315 thoughts on “Cologne companions (An Excerpt from my Diary)”

  1. Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your
    point. You clearly know what youre talking about, why waste your intelligence on just posting videos
    to your weblog when you could be giving us something enlightening to
    read?

    Reply
  2. Hmm is anyone else experiencing problems with the images on this blog loading?
    I’m trying to find out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog.
    Any feed-back would be greatly appreciated.

    Reply
  3. Hello would you mind letting me know which hosting company you’re working
    with? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot faster then most.
    Can you suggest a good hosting provider at a fair price?
    Kudos, I appreciate it!

    Reply
  4. Wonderful beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your site,
    how could i subscribe for a blog website? The account helped
    me a acceptable deal. I were a little bit familiar of
    this your broadcast offered shiny clear concept

    Reply
  5. Greetings! This is my 1st comment here so I just wanted
    to give a quick shout out and say I really enjoy reading through your blog posts.
    Can you suggest any other blogs/websites/forums
    that cover the same subjects? Appreciate it!

    Reply
  6. I have been exploring for a little bit for any high-quality articles or
    blog posts in this sort of space . Exploring in Yahoo I
    finally stumbled upon this website. Studying this information So i’m satisfied to exhibit that I have an incredibly just right
    uncanny feeling I discovered exactly what I needed.
    I most certainly will make sure to don?t overlook this web site and give it a glance regularly.
    ps4 https://bitly.com/3z5HwTp ps4 games

    Reply
  7. Hi! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading through this post reminds
    me of my previous room mate! He always kept chatting about this.
    I will forward this article to him. Fairly certain he will have a good read.

    Thank you for sharing!

    Reply
  8. Its such as you learn my thoughts! You appear to understand
    so much about this, like you wrote the e book in it or something.
    I think that you simply can do with a few percent to drive the message home a bit,
    however other than that, this is magnificent blog. A great read.
    I’ll definitely be back.

    Reply
  9. I blog often and I seriously thank you for your information. This
    article has truly peaked my interest. I’m going to
    take a note of your site and keep checking
    for new information about once a week. I subscribed to your RSS feed
    too.

    Reply
  10. Undeniably believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason seemed to
    be on the internet the simplest thing to be aware of.
    I say to you, I definitely get annoyed while people think about worries that they plainly don’t know
    about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and defined out the whole thing
    without having side effect , people could take a signal.

    Will likely be back to get more. Thanks

    Reply
  11. I know this if off topic but I’m looking into starting my own blog
    and was curious what all is needed to get set up? I’m assuming
    having a blog like yours would cost a pretty penny?
    I’m not very web savvy so I’m not 100% certain. Any recommendations or advice would be
    greatly appreciated. Appreciate it

    Reply
  12. Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Thank you, However I am having troubles with your RSS.
    I don’t know the reason why I can’t join it.
    Is there anybody having identical RSS problems? Anyone who knows the answer will you kindly respond?
    Thanx!!

    Reply
  13. Howdy would you mind letting me know which hosting company you’re working with?
    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot faster
    then most. Can you recommend a good internet hosting provider at a reasonable price?
    Thanks, I appreciate it!

    Reply
  14. It’s really a great and helpful piece of information. I am satisfied that
    you shared this useful information with us.
    Please keep us informed like this. Thanks for sharing.

    Reply
  15. Someone necessarily lend a hand to make significantly articles
    I would state. This is the very first time I frequented your web page and so far?
    I amazed with the research you made to create this actual submit amazing.

    Fantastic activity!

    Reply
  16. I like this blog very much, Its a very nice place to read and obtain information. “There is no human problem which could not be solved if people would simply do as I advise.” by Gore Vidal.

    Reply
  17. Do you have a spam problem on this blog; I also am a blogger, and I was curious about your situation; we have developed some nice methods and we are looking to trade methods with other folks, be sure to shoot me an e-mail if interested.

    Reply
  18. After I originally commented I appear to have clicked on the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and from now on every time a comment is added I recieve 4 emails with the exact same comment. Perhaps there is a means you can remove me from that service? Cheers.

    Reply
  19. Hi, I do believe this is an excellent site. I stumbledupon it 😉 I’m going to come back yet again since i have book marked it. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to help other people.

    Reply
  20. Thank you for every other wonderful article. Where else may just anyone get that type of information in such an ideal method of writing? I’ve a presentation next week, and I am on the look for such info.

    Reply
  21. Can I simply say what a comfort to find somebody who really understands what they’re talking about over the internet. You certainly understand how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More and more people must look at this and understand this side of the story. I was surprised you are not more popular because you surely possess the gift.

    Reply
  22. Hi there! This blog post could not be written much better! Looking at this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept preaching about this. I’ll send this information to him. Pretty sure he will have a great read. Many thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  23. I would like to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in penning this blog. I’m hoping to view the same high-grade content from you later on as well. In truth, your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my own blog now 😉

    Reply
  24. Oh my goodness! Incredible article dude! Thank you so much, However I am encountering troubles with your RSS. I don’t understand the reason why I cannot join it. Is there anybody having the same RSS issues? Anybody who knows the answer will you kindly respond? Thanks!

    Reply
  25. I was suggested this blog via my cousin. I am now not sure whether this publish is written by means of him as no one else realize such targeted approximately my problem. You’re wonderful! Thank you!

    Reply
  26. I jumped out of the car and she followed running bare footed with me into the football change room. The smell of men�s sweat and liniment filled the room and adding to the sensory overload.

    Reply
  27. I blog quite often and I truly thank you for your content. Your article has truly peaked my interest. I am going to bookmark your blog and keep checking for new details about once a week. I subscribed to your RSS feed as well.

    Reply
  28. Its like you learn my mind! You appear to understand a lot approximately this, like you wrote the guide in it or something. I think that you just could do with a few p.c. to drive the message house a little bit, but other than that, this is great blog. An excellent read. I’ll certainly be back.

    Reply
  29. Whoa! This blog looks just like my old one! It’s on a completely differenttopic but it has pretty much the same layout and design. Outstanding choiceof colors!

    Reply
  30. F*ckin’ awesome things here. I am very satisfied to look your article. Thank you so much and i’m taking a look forward to contact you. Will you please drop me a e-mail?

    Reply
  31. Hi there colleagues, how is the whole thing, and what you would like to sayconcerning this post, in my view its genuinely awesome for me.

    Reply

Leave a Comment