Dear Moavi (In a transit to transcendent )

 Dear Moavi
Are you surprised to see me here?
In this transit to transcendent, as you wait to catch your train into a paradoxical dimension and I stand looking at you admiring you in the awe of you in my perplex bustling ambiance of numbness. An oxymoron is our rendezvous of the seeker and the seeking, you haven’t aged a bit, holding your umbrella in whose reflection I see the sky under whose shelter I sense a comfort of longingness. 
We are meeting after ages dear and a century has succumbed in this oblivion, myriad drinks I had smoking the cigarettes of the imaginative smoke, I often think about you talking to wind and whispering me in the midnight, your skirt swirling as the earth revolves a revolution in itself a season of ambient stardusts, your hairs sliding next to my windowpane as I peer deep into those eyes an ocean of shallow depths, whose measure is what I call unfathomable, I wonder why you keep pushing me away and yet being always there, in a world with ajar doors.
Dear, I long for you as the clock ticks I fear you taking that medium of yours letting your light fade keeping me in the dark to be hunted by this worldly brightness.  
What, how I am?
Don’t you know dear don’t you know, lost as always wandering in an abyss as the winter surfaces.
The season of blankets and the gulf of shivers, the chills of nails as the dragon unleashes its breath, it’s been years that we left mountains yet does it left me?
I see snow in the layers of ambiguity as I stand on foothills I feel a swamp pulling me in, it’s omnipresent and it’s ubiquitous its an ephemeral moment of realization and a lifetime of procrastination, from knitted sweaters to logs embracing in the burning wrath, to opening doors beneath the cherished dolphins to chasing you in all those long walks sliding over the falling leaves.
Can I fly?
Won’t you pull me, even if I can’t?
I’m stuck dear in a world I die every passing day, I need you Moavi I need you to allow me a sleep, I need you to make me dream, walking on the stone pavement next to the trees with amber leaves amidst twilight next to that lake of ours, I want you to allow me to open my eyes only to realize that birds are there too, chirping tweeting and making me realize that you have left a note.
You departed in a blink dear you departed in a fragment leaving behind a man weak and burdened, broken unbroken and broken, calling for you adjusting his long and unsettled cap, crossing his arms and steadily reducing his pace, as the heart skips its beat and as the echo returns dejected in dismay.I was so close to you today, I heard you and my fingers almost reached the vulnerability of yours.
In the skyline of will lacking consent.

Dear Moavi……..I wish I had told you and I wish I hadn’t lied

By- Kshitij Sinha